Early Introspection

Early Introspectionmy early work questioned everything – and then some

My early work was penned questioning everything.  Here there may or may not be a story linked to what is posted; perhaps I’ll come back at a later date to tell the story.  For now, this will be a depository of a far from static mind.

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Every now and then I will come across something penned during the darker years of my life that makes me go “hmmm.”  The following is just such a piece.  Considering the many changes and assaults on free enterprise, the incessant court battles to maintain the freedoms our men and women gave their lives for since the inception of our country, this almost sounds prophetic.

Having survived more betrayal and fights (to hold whatever dignity I had left), my vision became poisoned from anger and fear of a world that did not fit the one so wholesomely displayed in the movie scripts and television shows I grew up on.  Where were the “Old Yellers” and the “Lassies” and of course . . . “Bonanzas” and “That Girl”, where hard times coupled with hard work, truth, honor and respect resulted in virtuous living,  fulfilled dreams?

In spite of reality of my routinely cruel world (the one circumstances, my bad choices and poor judgement landed me in), I convinced myself that somehow life could be and should be like those shows.  A world where people defended one another’s honor, the good guy wins and the bad guys pay for their crimes, and a young woman could become anyone she wanted to be.

Sadly, after all these years, I know at last, a young woman (any woman) can have the dream she wants, if she believes it and if she’s willing to do what it takes and knows she needs help getting there.  For me, that’s not just anybody’s help, it means with God’s help because the struggle is great.  Nevertheless, HOPE prevails.

Here now, more than twenty years later is the dark and prophetic verse I wrote.
Freedom — Really!

— Kat     12/2012

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Interesting how perspective changes depending on where you are in life.  Today, life is good. Fully surrendering my life to Christ has finally brought growth but it has taken many years and great strife, getting lost in painful heartache over and over again before realizing I had been running away from the one love that could never fail me.

Coming to the realization I could be happy without a husband, I began to reconnect with the girl full of dreams behind the face in the mirror.  Once we were on safer ground, enjoying newfound strength and becoming (as a friend of mine put it) “comfortable in our own skin,” I became more confident that I was okay with my singleness.  In the midst of that cycle I penned “SEDUCTION EXPOSED” with my tongue firmly planted in my cheek!

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My dark years were not without moments of peace and sweet and bittersweet.  One such moment was the passing of a family member with a devotion to his God and family.  Faith can make a farewell so much easier, here is FAREWELL TO MAHLON KLINE

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